Accepting Yourself the Way You Are

When you look in the mirror, what do you say to yourself? Do you notice all your flaws and wish you looked different? (Or do you see your best features and thank your body for everything it’s done for you?)

How do you receive compliments? Do you say thank you with a smile? (Or do you counter it with self-criticism?)

Do you use negative words like dumb, fat, and stupid when you think about yourself or talk about yourself? Do you criticize yourself both to yourself and to others? (Or do you use empowering words and focus on your positive attributes?)

Do you think life would be better if only you had a better job or worked harder or if you lost some weight or if you had nicer clothes or a more expensive car? Do you think people would like you more if you put on fake eyelashes or carry an expensive purse?

I know people like this. They put themselves down all the time for one reason or another, and they can’t accept compliments when you point out something positive about them. They think what’s on the outside matters more than what’s on the inside. They think happiness is always around the corner if they just do more, have more, weigh less, be a certain way etc. They never find happiness because they are focused on the wrong things.


I’m here to tell you to stop it if you are one of these people. Just stop it. You are enough. You are perfect the way you are. You don’t need to change to please anyone else, and you don’t need to change to be happy or to be loved by others.

In fact, happiness comes from inner peace. Happiness comes from the inside. It’s not something you find outside of you. And it’s definitely not something you find in a material object. People who will judge you and like or not like you based on something material are not real friends anyway.

But can’t we all make improvements? Absoutely, yes we can. If you need or want to lose weight, go for it! If you want a better job, go for it! If you want flashy clothes and cars, go for it, but don’t think that changes your value as a human being. If you want to change your lifestyle choices like eating better or drinking less or working out more, go for it, you will still be perfect every single day on every single step of the way. You will still be lovable and worthy.

We are all exactly where we need to be, and we are perfect exactly the way we are. We are all beings of love and light on separate journeys in this life. We are all unique and perfect in our imperfections. We are all very different, and we all have positive aspects about ourselves, and that’s great!


Just be you. It’s really simple. You’re already you. When you accept yourself the way you are, your confidence will make you shine. When you are secure that your life is a wonderful thing just the way it is, you start to appreciate what you have. When you let go of caring what other people think, you are free to be whatever you want and smile about it.


Try looking in the mirror and seeing what is beautiful about you. Try identifying a few character traits you like about yourself. Try being grateful for everything you have (make a list) and examine your relationships to see which ones are genuine. Let go of people who drain you and situations that wear down your sense of self. Identify goals and take baby steps to meet them. Keep growing in the direction of your choosing. Never lose track of who you really are inside.


We only get one life, and life is short. Find your inner peace and enjoy it.

Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!


2014 in Review and My Hopes for 2015

New Year’s Eve 2014 is here. It’s the time to reflect on the past year and make resolutions for the next. For years, I’ve been working on accepting myself exactly the way I am and living each day in the moment, free of regrets from the past and worries about the future. This kind of thinking has led to great changes in my life, and I intend to further develop myself one day at a time.

What a year it’s been! There’s been a wide spectrum of emotions and experiences. Lots of pain and lots of growth occurred this past year. I got divorced after 14 years of marriage. It was hard. It was painful. It was complicated. There was a loss of a fairy tale and a loss of my family structure. I lost fifty percent of my time with my kids. We sold our big, beautiful house (that we moved to Texas for) and moved into rentals, a house for me and an apartment for him. While everything looked great from the outside, my ex and I had some serious personal problems that ultimately we were not able to resolve. We agreed to put the children first and to co-parent in peace. We agreed not to drag each other through the mud and to keep our personal business between us. While I lost half the time with my kids, he gained the other fifty percent of the time, and the kids are adjusting to their new lives well. They enjoy the one on one time they get with him now. And I think that while they might prefer we still be together, they see that life can be peaceful and happy even with the changes. It was a painful experience, but I’ve been brave and have learned a lot from it about being true to myself and taking care of myself. In the new year, I intend to continue using the time to myself for self-care. When I don’t have the kids, I sleep, do yoga, go to the gym, play guitar, do math etc. I use the time to take care of myself and continue growing in all my interests and hobbies. I miss the children terribly, but I know they are in good hands, and I am thankful their father wants to be an active part of their lives.


For years, I’ve wanted to take college math classes because nobody ever made me take them when I was in school. I didn’t know I liked math until I became a teacher and started specializing in teaching math. So, this year I took advantage of the opportunity since I had time (being a stay home mom) and finally took Trigonometry and Calculus 1. I got an A in Trigonometry, so my professor let me skip Pre-Calculus. I spent the spring semester taking Trig and the fall semester taking Calculus 1. I struggled with Calculus and went from a C to an F to a B overall. I learned so much about what it feels like to struggle as a student and thankfully found an excellent tutor who supported my struggles and helped to make everything make sense. At one point, I considered dropping the class, but I’m not a quitter so I stuck with it. I learned first-hand that hard works pays off and I was thrilled to finish successfully and check that class off my bucket list! In the next year, my goal is to get back to teaching full-time. I would really like to teach high school math this time. I have my master’s degree in education. I’m certified to teach all subjects 4-8 and math 8-12, and although my eight years of classroom experience was in middle school, I’ve been tutoring high school students since 2001. I’ve been working as a substitute teacher this fall and have really enjoyed subbing in the high schools. I prefer the older students and the more advanced math curricula. I quit my job to be a stay home mom years ago, and it’s difficult to get back into a full-time position, but this will be my main goal for 2015.

I took an amazing trip to Aruba for a yoga retreat, another bucket list item. Click here to read about my amazing week with yoga girl Rachel Brathen in paradise. I’ve also been participating in a 365 day handstand challenge and intend to finish it in 2015. I am on handstand number 259!


My yoga retreat group



My kids are continuing to grow and thrive, and I absolutely love being their mom. I’m cherishing every stage of their lives even though it’s tough sometimes knowing that I don’t have little kids anymore. Those days are over, but they are growing into amazing older children and my oldest is officially an adult now, 21 years old and graduating from college this year. She’s majoring in Business Marketing and Management and plans to move back to the Dallas area to work after graduation. Her laugh is infectious; her sense of humor is hilarious. She’s an avid dog lover and has been helping me take care of my dogs some this year. In fact, she might be taking my Boston Terrier back to school with her for a few months this spring. She’s been working part-time at a hair salon and getting good grades. I’m so proud of her! In 2015, I look forward to attending her graduation, her 22nd birthday in May, and seeing how her adult life unfolds when she moves back to Dallas and starts working.


My middle child is now 14, a high school freshman on the drill team at school and a competitive company dancer at a local dance studio. Watching her dance is one of my favorite things to do. She specializes in contemporary dance, and sometimes it’s so beautiful it brings me to tears with pride. We spent a week in Panama City Beach, FL in June for national competition, and it was a really fun vacation together. She just got her braces off and has a brand new smile. She is an excellent student and is well liked by her friends. I’m learning to give her more space to be a teenager and love it when she has her friends over to our house. In 2015, I look forward to another season of dance competitions and conventions, a week in Florida for national competition, and her 15th birthday in April.


My youngest child, my son, is now ten years old and a vibrant, intelligent fourth grader who loves science and thrives on challenge. He loves reading books and playing games and doing all kinds of sporty things with me like bike riding, rock climbing at the gym, swimming, roller skating, and playing games of horse. I love his sense of adventure and getting out to be active with him. We have a great time. He is also really loving and gives lots of hugs and kisses, one of my favorite things about him. He is a deep thinker and asks all kinds of questions about life, nature, and the universe. I know he is destined for great things in the future and in 2015, I look forward to watching him play baseball, spending a week in Florida together, and his birthday in November.


This year, I had the kids for Thanksgiving, my ex had them for the first week of Christmas, and I have them for the second week of Christmas vacation. In 2015, I look forward to having them for spring break and then for the first week of Christmas vacation. I am super proud of all three of them and want the best for them in the upcoming year with good health and lots of happiness.

This year, I ended a friendship with someone I thought was my best friend in town. She betrayed me, backstabbed me, lied to me, then called me ugly names when I confronted her. All I can control is me, so I ended it, and I’m really glad she is out of my life now as I can see it was really a one-way friendship for years. She is not really worth any more time or space on my blog, so I will move forward to the good news: I gained a new best friend in town this year. She’s another dance mom who has kids close in age to my youngest two kids, and she lives nearby. She’s been a great friend to me this year, someone who has a huge heart and does anything to help other people. She’s been there for me whenever I’ve needed a friend, and I truly enjoy her company! She’s funny, caring, and has a genuine personality. We’ve had lots of great times together this year. I look forward to many more good times in 2015 and hope to continue to develop my other girl-friendships with get togethers and outings.


I fell in love again this year with a man from Virginia whom I’ve known since we were twelve. His dad caught us kissing when we were in middle school, and after that we were always dating other people but hung out together as friends all the time. He was in a near fatal accident in high school, and we lost touch after he switched to another school and then I graduated and left for college. The girl who was driving the car that night died, and I’ve always been so thankful that he survived. He has always been a precious life in my opinion. We reconnected at a funeral for a friend in 2007 and have been in touch ever since. He went to Aruba with me, and we’ve been traveling back and forth visiting each other in Virginia and Texas as often as we can. It’s been amazing to find love with someone with whom I also have a deep friendship and a long history. I’m super grateful the timing is right for us to be a couple and have enjoyed every single moment we’ve spent together so far. In 2015, I look forward to his February visit to Texas (to celebrate our birthdays – we were born nine days apart) and hope we can visit each other many, many more times also. Since we are in a long distance relationship, and we both have children to raise, people often ask us how we are going to work things out so we can be in the same place. I don’t know the answer to that question yet, and I’m not going to worry about it either. It’s working for both of us right now, and I trust that things will unfold exactly the way they should. I would rather have him in my life to talk and text with every day and see periodically than not at all. So, I am grateful, humble, and hopeful for the future.


I intend to spend 2015 really enjoying every day to its fullest, loving people in my life, and taking good care of myself. When negative things happen, I will look for the positive lessons, and I will accept challenges as opportunities to grow. I will continue to cultivate an attitude of gratitude for the many blessings in my life and face each day with courage, an open mind, and a positive attitude.


Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!

Handstand365: Days 114-227

Another hundred plus handstands, and many more life lessons learned since my last post about my progress. I’m almost two-thirds the way done with the #handstand365 challenge, and I am learning more and more every day with this fun practice.

I learned a whole lot about technique when I went to Aruba for a week in August and did a yoga retreat with yoga girl Rachel Brathen. I learned to exhale when I kick up (sometimes I would hold my breath in the past). I learned to make sure my shoulders are directly above my wrists. I learned to put most of the pressure in my hands on the thumb knuckle and first two finger knuckles. Doing this is difficult, but it makes a difference in doing handstands as well as in other yoga poses that use your hands on the ground. I learned to squeeze my legs together and to squeeze in my core. It’s hard to keep track of all these things and to perform a handstand, but I practice almost every day, and I think I am improving little by little.

I have an amazing boyfriend who does handstands with me, and together we’ve learned how to balance together and share fun times doing yoga! We’ve tried back to back handstands as well as front to front kissing handstands. We want to pursue some acro-yoga where we can do other poses together too. It’s so fun to share yoga with someone you love.

I’ve literally learned to find my plumb-line when upside down. I’ve started to be able to hold my handstands for a bit longer than a split second, and it’s a weird feeling, something that is hard to describe. But I get a balanced feeling. And then I have to focus on my core and squeezing my legs together and then usually I have to come down. I look forward to the day when I can hold it longer with complete control.

Also, I’ve learned the importance of symmetry. Whatever I do on one side of my body, I do on the other side of my body. For the first hundred or so handstands I mainly led with one leg. Once I spent time in Aruba, I learned to try it on both sides. Surprisingly I was able to balance pretty well right away on the other side. So, every time I do a handstand, I make sure to practice it on both sides now.

I’ve experimented with some other forms of handstands also like hollow-back handstands, forearm handstands, and handstand scorpion. These poses build on the basic foundations with more difficult variations.

I’ve learned to incorporate this sense of balance, challenge, and persistence in my personal life as well. When upsetting things happen, I try not to take it personally, feel whatever I am feeling, let go of the negative and return to a centered place mentally. I’ve learned to keep trying when things are difficult because that’s when the change takes place. We don’t get stronger when things are easy. So if I fail at something, I try again. I don’t let setbacks set me back. I keep going with a smile and face the challenge again and again….with a sense of calm confidence that all I can do is do my best and that is enough in every situation. I gave up on caring what other people think of me and I focus on me and what I want to do regardless of others’ opinions. (Think what it’s like to do handstands in public places…it really does teach you not to care what people think). I’m self assured and look for joy in every day. I laugh every time I’m done doing a handstand!

My sense of inner peace is strong. My sense of self is strong. My sense of adventure is strong. I am ready for what each day has to offer and I appreciate each day because I know that’s all we really have. I have confidence and a zest for life that was missing for a long time.

Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!


















































































































Tattoo You

Do you have tattoos? When did you get them? Why did you get them?

I waited until I was in my forties to get my first tattoo because I wanted to be sure of any artwork I chose to place permanently on my body. My first tattoo was of my (now ex) husband’s name with Korean symbols for love and family next to it. Likewise, he got the same Korean symbols and my name in the middle. We thought this was a good idea at the time.


A year later I got a yin/yang with all four of our kids’ names all around it. We both had older kids from previous relationships and we had two together. There was balance.

About a year after that I got a heart with wings and a halo on my upper back. I did that with my father and some friends in mind whom I’ve lost over the years. It’s a way of reminding myself that love is eternal.

Now that I’m divorced, I decided to cover up my ex’s name. He’s removing mine from his body, but I decided to leave his there and to grow on top of it much like I am doing in real life. He’s still a part of me and my life but plays a much different role now in the background. On top of all of that, a new me is growing and my new relationship is growing. Something old is evolving into something new and beautiful. Just like my new tattoo on top if the old one.

My artist went back over his name with white first and then redid the symbols so they would be just as black as my new piece. It’s ironic that in getting rid of the old tattoo, I had it completely traced over again essentially. It’s like the universe saying to me, ‘look you’re starting over but don’t forget where you came from.’

I had the outline done first and just went back today for the colors and shading. I’m super happy with my new piece!


Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!

Law of Attraction

Our thoughts generate our worlds. What we think is what we become. What we think about is what happens all around us. When I went to Aruba for a yoga retreat with Rachel Brathen, Yoga Girl, we spent our first session together introducing ourselves and then drAwing angels cards to set the intention for the week. Here’s the card I drew:


I believe in this concept. It’s energy and science. Whatever you put out there into the universe comes back to you like echoes of karma. You reap
what you sow. What goes around comes around.

The main thing to remember is we all drive our own ships. We are our own captains in life so to speak. We direct our paths by our thoughts and create our realities by our choices.

So what are you thinking about?


Think about love and light. Think about the positive things in your life.


Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!

21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 21: Self Love


What makes me happy? 70 minute reflexology sessions! Got one tonight after having a nice day taking care of myself (went to the gym, practiced handstands and forearm stands, did a little shopping and took myself out to eat a healthy dinner at Pei Wei).

Click here to learn more about reflexology. It’s like massage but different, and I love it!

I think the concept of self love is super important and have been working hard in this area over the past several years. I blog about it under the category Self Care Sunday

Ever heard of the golden rule? You know, ‘treat others as you want to be treated’? I like that idea, but it could use some extension. How about treating ourselves the way we want to be treated? How about being nice to ourselves, doing things we enjoy, doing things that are healthy for us? If we don’t take care of ourselves, we are not really any good to other people. If we aren’t happy and whole being ourselves, we don’t have much to offer others. On the flip side, if we continue through life without making ourselves a priority, it not only affects us and our overall health, it can also get in the way of healthy happy relationships with others.

If you haven’t seen this video yet, please take a few minutes to watch. It’s worth it. Ben Smythe has a way with words and expresses it better than I can. Just watch and listen. Watch it and listen to it a few times. He makes several excellent points and he is hilarious!

Click here – Ben Smythe on Attracting Unfulfilling Relationships

I just want to say thank you to Rachel Brathen for this fun challenge! Some days were easier than others. My favorites that I don’t already do often and want to keep doing more are: get creative, Mother Nature, start a new routine, something new, and sweat. The hardest one for me was rise and shine. I only did it that one morning! My chiropractor says my adrenal glands are not happy and I need more sleep, so for now I won’t be rising too early. Overall, I already try to do some yoga and meditation every day (even if it’s brief), be grateful, say I love you, and get shit done.

I also focus hard every day on self love. It’s what’s helped me grow through a lot of pain and difficult times. Loving myself and taking care of myself has helped me be happy being myself. Once I found some inner peace I think things started to fall into place in my life. I also think taking care of myself is a good role model for my kids.

Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!

21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 20: Something New #yogagirlchallenge


Took my dogs, Marley and Daisy, to the new dog park in town. We’ve never been there before. They met new doggies and people, and I even incorporated a couple of the other days of the challenge by sweating outside enjoying Mother Nature, being grateful for the time to do it and for the beautiful day and for my two dogs, and I also did some yoga handstands and reclined on a bench and meditated for about five minutes. After the dog park, we took a walk and then came home to cool off. It was a fun little adventure, and I am interested in finding some other new things to do.


Here is the handstand I did at the dog park and posted in the #handstand365 challenge.

If you could do something new, what would it be? I was surprised by how few ideas I had.

Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!

21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 19: Random Act of Kindness #yogagirlchallenge


Happy to support my friend’s project, 31 Days of Urban Agriculture, using her art to educate people about urban farming. Everybody eats food, so this is something everyone can benefit from learning about. to check out and support the project.

I’m especially interested because of all my issues with food allergies, I try to eat mostly a whole foods diet. I avoid processed foods as much as possible and like the least amount of additives possible in my foods. I’ve had so much food allergy testing and every time I have more positive results.

I am sensitive to/intolerant of:

white potatoes and nightshade vegetables
lima beans

21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 18: Mother Nature #yogagirlchallenge



Today I did yoga with bare feet on the grass at a local park. Yes some people saw me, but I didn’t really care. It felt great to sweat, like an outdoor version of hot yoga. I turned off my phone and enjoyed the sounds of nature while I practiced for about 45 minutes followed by about five minutes of meditation under a tree. It was a beautiful blue sky sun shiny day! Loved my view of the pretty trees while I practiced (lower left).

Since I also participate in the #handstand365 challenge, I did my daily handstand and posted that picture too. Besides my feet getting itchy from the grass, it was overall an excellent experience. I’ve never tried doing yoga outside on the grass before. It felt great to do it in a different setting like that.

I am a huge fan of Mother Nature! It started when I did a 95 day semester in the Rockies in 1989. Then, I worked for Greenpeace for a while and became an avid rock climber and mountain biker. I’ve been known to hug trees frequently! As I’ve gotten older, I’ve moved away from the outdoor adventure sports but not my connection with the environment. I still feel at my best when I am in nature somewhere. The beach is my favorite, but living in Texas that’s not always an option!

Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!

21 Day yoga Girl Challenge Day 17: I Love You #yogagirlchallenge


There is so much love overflowing from my heart for these people: my three amazing kids and my best friend/boyfriend Bill. See that big happy smile on my face? That’s because loving these people makes me so happy! I try to tell them every single day how much I love them and how much I appreciate them in my life.

I’ve been a mom for 21 years now. Loving my kids has been the most rewarding thing I’ve done in my whole life. It’s an unconditional love that weathers the storms and celebrates the good times and fills in all the spaces in between. l tell them I love them, and I also show them with my actions, being there every day for them, holding their hands, giving them big hugs and kisses, giving encouraging words when they need them, and so many more ways.

Bill and I are in a new relationship, but the love is strong and based on 34 years of friendship and history. I love him with all my heart, and he gives it right back to me. People tell us we ooze positive, loving vibrations when they are around us. We can’t help it; we glow with love.

I also took some time to let other people know I love them. I contacted my mom and told her. I posted some messages on people’s Facebook timelines. I try to be open and loving to people on a daily basis, but it did feel good to consciously make a point of saying those three words together.


Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!