Handstand365: Days 114-227

Another hundred plus handstands, and many more life lessons learned since my last post about my progress. I’m almost two-thirds the way done with the #handstand365 challenge, and I am learning more and more every day with this fun practice.

I learned a whole lot about technique when I went to Aruba for a week in August and did a yoga retreat with yoga girl Rachel Brathen. I learned to exhale when I kick up (sometimes I would hold my breath in the past). I learned to make sure my shoulders are directly above my wrists. I learned to put most of the pressure in my hands on the thumb knuckle and first two finger knuckles. Doing this is difficult, but it makes a difference in doing handstands as well as in other yoga poses that use your hands on the ground. I learned to squeeze my legs together and to squeeze in my core. It’s hard to keep track of all these things and to perform a handstand, but I practice almost every day, and I think I am improving little by little.

I have an amazing boyfriend who does handstands with me, and together we’ve learned how to balance together and share fun times doing yoga! We’ve tried back to back handstands as well as front to front kissing handstands. We want to pursue some acro-yoga where we can do other poses together too. It’s so fun to share yoga with someone you love.

I’ve literally learned to find my plumb-line when upside down. I’ve started to be able to hold my handstands for a bit longer than a split second, and it’s a weird feeling, something that is hard to describe. But I get a balanced feeling. And then I have to focus on my core and squeezing my legs together and then usually I have to come down. I look forward to the day when I can hold it longer with complete control.

Also, I’ve learned the importance of symmetry. Whatever I do on one side of my body, I do on the other side of my body. For the first hundred or so handstands I mainly led with one leg. Once I spent time in Aruba, I learned to try it on both sides. Surprisingly I was able to balance pretty well right away on the other side. So, every time I do a handstand, I make sure to practice it on both sides now.

I’ve experimented with some other forms of handstands also like hollow-back handstands, forearm handstands, and handstand scorpion. These poses build on the basic foundations with more difficult variations.

I’ve learned to incorporate this sense of balance, challenge, and persistence in my personal life as well. When upsetting things happen, I try not to take it personally, feel whatever I am feeling, let go of the negative and return to a centered place mentally. I’ve learned to keep trying when things are difficult because that’s when the change takes place. We don’t get stronger when things are easy. So if I fail at something, I try again. I don’t let setbacks set me back. I keep going with a smile and face the challenge again and again….with a sense of calm confidence that all I can do is do my best and that is enough in every situation. I gave up on caring what other people think of me and I focus on me and what I want to do regardless of others’ opinions. (Think what it’s like to do handstands in public places…it really does teach you not to care what people think). I’m self assured and look for joy in every day. I laugh every time I’m done doing a handstand!

My sense of inner peace is strong. My sense of self is strong. My sense of adventure is strong. I am ready for what each day has to offer and I appreciate each day because I know that’s all we really have. I have confidence and a zest for life that was missing for a long time.

Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!



















































































































21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 13: Be Fearless #yogagirlchallenge

Today I started a calculus class at the age of 46 because I want to take it!


Calculus is typically a college freshman class, but nobody ever made me take it in college. These days many kids take it as high school seniors since they have the opportunity to excel one or two years in math.

Click here to read about my love affair with math.

I didn’t want to pursue a math related field when I was in college so I didn’t really care about it back then. When I became a teacher in 1998 I fell in love with math and realized I was good at it. Ever since then, I’ve specialized in math and have been tutoring math privately since 2001. I am certified to teach all subjects 4-8 and math 8-12, but once kids finish Algebra 2, I usually have to refer them out.

I quit my teaching job in 2004 to be a stay home mom and have wanted to take calculus since about 2007. When I decided to do it, I found out that first I had to take college algebra, trigonometry, and precalculus. So I took college algebra in 2007 and just finished trigonometry this spring 2014. There was a long break I’m between due to personal stuff. Since I got an a in Trigonometry and my algebra is so strong, my professor let me skip precalculus.

So here I am, being fearless and taking a class out of desire that most people would rather have a root canal than complete. I’m not scared. I am going to do my best. If it’s super hard I will work super hard. I’m not scared. It can only help not hurt.

21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 6: Start a New Routine #yogagirlchallenge





Today, I started my day drinking hot lemon water. I crave coffee first thing, but I made it a priority today to have hot lemon water first. Apparently, it’s healthier to have it on an empty stomach after a night of sleep. I can see that. It’s science. If it works, I will try it. And then I will have coffee haha!

Then, I took my doggies for a walk. Marley is a Boston Terrier (almost 7 years old), and Daisy is a Chihuaua/Hound mix (just turned 1, our rescue puppy). We walk the circle around the neighborhood and take in all the sights and sounds. I love walking my dogs. Sometimes I get lazy because I can open my back door and let them out. So I figure they can run around and take care of business.

I do think it’s better all around if we walk every day. I will try to start this as a new routine. Hot lemon water and a walk with the dogs. Let’s do this!

Thanks for reading this entry Peace out!!


21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 3: Rise & Shine! #yogagirlchallenge


For today’s challenge, Rachel challenged us to set the alarm an hour early, get up and use the time in a healing way of some kind. Incorporating yoga and meditation from days one and two were great ways to use the time. I just happened to need to get up at 5:00am that day, so it was perfect timing for me. I am not a morning person at all but have been working on going to bed earlier and getting up earlier for a few months now. I got up early, drank lemon water then coffee and had a quiet time at my house. After a little while when the sun was going to rise, I took my two dogs out for a walk in the neighborhood. The picture above is from that sunrise walk. It was refreshing to see the sunrise for a change. I usually savor sunsets here in Texas, in fact that day I got to see both the sunrise and the sunset. They were both beautiful.

When I returned home, I did pilates and sat in meditation for a while. It was a wonderful feeling to start the day that way. I was so tired during the day though! I had to take two naps. I don’t think I’ve caught up yet from all the travelling and all the late nights recently. After a week of doing yoga twice a day, I have been craving it in the morning and at night, so I like this idea of getting up a little early so you can get some things done before the day starts.

My kids are on vacation with their dad this week, so it’s an excellent time for me to catch up on my sleep. I keep setting my alarm early with the intention of taking this challenge from day to day, but so far I only did it that one day! Whenever I turn off my alarm and go back to sleep I get another couple hours, so I think my body needs it. I will try to incorporate this idea more in the future when I actually have to get up to get somewhere.


21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 5: Get Rid of a Bad Habit #yogagirlchallenge


I’m working on being early instead of running late. It was the perfect kind of morning for staying in bed and staying at home. It rained all night, and thunder woke me up in the morning. Heavy, loud thunder every few minutes with rain pouring on the house and down the street and flash flood warnings indicated it was not a great day to go outside and do anything. But, I love my yin yoga class on Sunday mornings, and since I’m doing Rachel Brathen’s challenge, I’m committed to doing yoga every day and incorporating as many of the daily challenges into my life. Yin yoga is mostly meditative, so it was a great mix of days one and two of the challenge. While I didn’t exactly wake up early (day three) I did get to class early.

Yoga classes at my gym, Lifetime Fitness, are not on island time. Class starts on time, and the door closes. If there is room in the class, they will open the door again after meditation at the beginning of class, but most of the time classes are full. Being late means missing the class. In fact, they advise getting there ten minutes early. Yogis line up at the door and wait to get a spot. Getting there early means extra meditation time at the beginning of class for me. I like to lie down on my mat, put a small towel over my eyes, and relax while I wait for class to start.


21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 2: Meditate #yogagirlchallenge


Elements of Meditation:
1. Closed eyes
2. Nostril breathing
3. Observation of bodily sensations
4. Letting go of thoughts

I first learned about meditation when I took a Buddhism class in college in 1988. We met for group meditation and tea in addition to classes. It was a little awkward and uncomfortable at first. It was hard to sit still with my eyes shut without feeling self-conscious.

Since then, I’ve mainly meditated during yoga classes. I also try to incorporate it into my life by doing lying down meditation before bed and taking advantage of the peace and quiet in the sauna and steam room at the gym to find some meditative moments.

Going along with this challenge and my experience at the yoga retreat in Aruba last week, I am working on keeping my morning yoga habit and ending it with seated meditation. It’s a peaceful, calming way to start the day.


Buddha sat under a bodhi tree until he reached enlightenment.


To do seated meditation, cross the legs and put the hands on the knees. Hands can be in an upward position for receiving or in a downward position for grounding. Or the hands can make a mudra or shape of some kind. Quiet the mind. Let go of thoughts without judgement. Bring attention to the breath. Inhale and exhale deeply and slowly. Repeat a mantra, count breaths, or think of nothing like still water. As thoughts enter the mind, let them go like ripples in the water until the water is still again. Or let thoughts go like clouds drifting across the sky. No judgements, just acknowledgement and detachment. Stay silent and still for a few minutes to start then increase over time.

There are many benefits of meditation. It calms the nervous system and helps develop a sense of inner peace. It helps balance our active lives and allows us to be present in the moment, not in the past, not worry about what’s happening next, fully present in the moment. Meditation connects us to the energy in the universe and allows us to open up chakras, energy centers, in our bodies.




Thinking about not thinking is a paradoxical practice that leads to a healthy, happy , calm, zen mindset. Meditation helps us find our center and be grounded. It’s a useful exercise every day and prepares us to handle stress in our lives.

Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!



21 Day Yoga Girl Challenge Day 1: Yoga Every Damn Day #yogagirlchallenge


Doing Yoga every day is the first challenge. I think I can do it! I’ve been doing a little bit of yoga every day for a while now. It doesn’t mean I make it to my mat or put on a dvd or attend class every day, but I do gentle stretches every day, and I think that counts!

I’ve been working on touching my toes to the back of my head in pidgeon pose. About a year ago, I was able to open to the side and grab my foot. Then I learned how to bind my hands putting my foot into my elbow. With the help of a strap, I’m arching my back and working toward bringing my toes to my head.



A simple child’s pose and some gentle cat/cow stretches before bed help to calm the nervous system and to deepen the breath. Savasana, or corpse pose, even counts. Lying still and letting go of thoughts and bringing attention to the breath is doing yoga just as much as sweating it out in a hot vinyasa class is. They are just different. That’s one thing I love about yoga. I can modify and go as far as I want to with my practice on any given day. Some days, I feel like I want the 75 minute hot vinyasa class with sweat pouring out of my pores and every muscle exerted and challenged with the flows the teacher presents. Other days, I want the exact opposite: a slow, meditative, restorative yin yoga practice. Sometimes, I don’t make it to the yoga studio at my gym and I use DVDs at home to practice. Again, there is variety from back care yoga to core yoga, and ashtanga and vinyasa flows. In either case, there is stretching and strengthening in the body, a calm attention to the breath and connection to the universe in the mind and spirit. Sometimes I will stretch and do yoga poses in public. Whenever the mood hits me is a good time for yoga!

My Yin Yoga teacher taught the seven axioms of yoga in class:

1. You are exactly where you are supposed to be
2. Fear and pain are life’s greatest teachers
3. Laughter and play are the keys to the fountain of youth
4. Exercise and rest are the keys to vibrant health
5. Touch and intimacy are basic human needs
6. Everything is impermanent
7. Everything is connected

Read more: http://ohsheglows.com/2010/10/06/7-universal-truths/#ixzz3AgEu4hi3

There is a connection between mind, body, and spirit when we practice yoga. We learn to experience life to the fullest and let go of the past. We learn that we are all one and celebrate each day of life, to drop baggage and drama from our lives.

I took my first yoga class my freshman year of college in 1986. I’ve done it off and on over the years and plan to continue practicing for a long time.

Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!


Yoga Retreat in Aruba with Yoga Girl Rachel Brathen

Susanne’s World has been under construction for the past nine months or so. My life turned upside down within the past year as I’ve been turning upside down, literally, advancing my yoga practice by doing handstands. The more work I did on myself, the more I realized I wasn’t truly happy. Today I am grateful I had the courage and the strength to recognize that and make the changes that needed to be made. I got divorced, sold and moved out of my house, and started crossing things off my bucket list. I spent last week in Aruba doing a yoga retreat with Yoga Girl Rachel Brathen, connecting with a beautiful new place on the earth, deepening my yoga practice and truly spending every day exactly how I wanted to. I have a new love in my life (an old friend since seventh grade) and couldn’t be happier. He joined me on the yoga retreat, and we had an amazing time together!


arrival day

I was starstruck when I first saw Rachel and Dennis. She is an internet celebrity, someone who inspires me daily with her pictures, videos, and words. Seeing her in person at the welcome dinner was amazing. I was giddy, hugging her saying, “I love you!” She was so cool and down to earth with a friendly smile. She shares highlights and lowlights from her life on social media, so it was like meeting someone I already knew a little about. We talked a little about her wedding and honeymoon as well as the recent passing of one of her dogs. Out on the beach, there were baby sea turtles in protected areas hatching and making their way to the sea. I wasn’t lucky enough to see one of them, but some other people in our group did and posted videos and pictures. We had a lovely dinner and met new friends, enjoyed the sunset and starry night sky.


with Rachel and Dennis

This is a typical view from the beach chairs in front of Manchebo Beach Resort & Spa, where we stayed. We did our daily handstand in front of our spot that day.  Instead of beach umbrellas, there were beach tiki huts, and the kind staff at the resort set up the chairs and brought drinks.   Eagle Beach is the widest beach on the island of Aruba, and our resort didn’t have any kids activities, so it was peaceful and serene.   There was a relatively long walk on the white sands until you hit the turquoise waters due to the wideness of the beach.  The sand was white and didn’t get too hot.  The color of the water was something I’ve never seen before.  Bright turquoise is the best description I can muster.  There were gentle waves and plenty of room to swim and float around.  A line of buoys contained the swimming area.  I swam out there and back a few times. The water got too deep to stand right away so it was fun to take a little swim.


handstands on the beach


typical view from my beach chair

We had two Stand Up Paddleboard (SUP) yoga lessons on Palm Beach near the high rise hotels. It was the more touristy and more crowded part of the island, but the water was still amazing! It was waist deep and calm. We used special boards made for doing yoga (Boga boards). They were wide and rounded on the ends and had a sticky yoga mat on the top. Doing yoga on the water is especially challenging because the stability of the floor is no longer there. You must release control to your surroundings and adjust accordingly. It works all the small muscles of your core and other places in your body in ways you normally don’t use them. The warrior series was the hardest of all the poses we did. Once one person fell, it was like a domino effect because the boards were so close together. Everybody fell in the water at some point or another, and I loved the metaphor with real life. When you have difficulty and fall down, laugh, smile, fall, and get back on the board.  The other life skill it helps develop is focusing on the moment.  If you let your mind wander and lose your focus, it’s pretty easy to fall off the board, so it really required being in the present moment.


Rachel teaching SUP yoga class #1


beautiful ocean


excited to try SUP yoga for the first time


SUP yoga class #1 in Palm Beach, Aruba


headstands on the Boga boards


Our group to an exciting hike on the north shore of Aruba to a natural pool.  It was located in the Arikok National Park, a large undeveloped area with a desert landscape, rocky trails to hike, bike, ride horses and four wheel drive vehicles.   There were beautiful ocotillo and other kinds of cactii, wild goats, and a varied terrain much different than the beachy areas.   Along the hike, we stopped to play at a beach where the waves are forced between rocky outcroppings.  Rachel said we had about ten minutes to play, so I jumped right in!   Unlike the waters in Eagle and Palm Beaches, these waters were rough. The waves were big, and I enjoyed body surfing in the crashing water.  The water took my hair tie and one of my earrings; I threw the other earring into the ocean as an offering.  I was exhilerated and felt that I could have stayed there longer to play!





The natural pool had rocky outcroppings, and the water from the waves crashed over and formed the pool.  It was so cool.  There was another smaller pool up a little higher than this one. It felt like a hot tub.  Saw lots of little crabs camoflauged on some vegetation growing on the rocks.  I brought my goggles and dived under the water to see many tropical fish teeming in the waters. You can see a wind farm in the distance.    I climbed up and sat to watch the ocean for a bit, contemplating its vastness and its incredible power.  The sun was shining, and the wind was blowing.  What an amazing place and an amazing moment!





My man taking it all in..




sunset in Aruba

That night, we had a restorative yin yoga session.  This was the magical view as I walked into class.  Everybody was tired from an active day.  Yin yoga is calming and relaxing.  We hold poses for longer (up to five or six minutes) deepening the stretch to the connective tissues.  In contrast to vinyasa flow where movements are tied to each breath and we generate heat in the body, a yin practice is cooling and still.  The hardest pose we did (for me) was frog pose, and we held it for a while.  Rachel talked about how we hold of lot of tension in our hips and frog pose helps to release it.  We did heart openers after that to release whatever emotional tension arised.  It’s a soft practice that feels like a whole other place when it’s over.  Holding hands with my man during savasana made the experience even more magical.


Yin Yoga class


handstand technique help from Rachel

Rachel taught us a lot about yoga including workshops on handstands, headstands, forearm stands, arm balances, and paid special attention to teaching us proper technique and alignment for chatarunga to upward facing dog to downward facing dog.  There were two yin yoga sessions, and the rest of them were intense and challenging. Dennis taught a class too, and it was the hardest class I’ve done in a long time!  We worked hard on our core strength as it’s a fundamental for many advanced skills.  I was thrilled to get some personal attention from her and am working on the pointers she gave me.  For example, when we have hands down on the ground they should be firmly planted with the most pressure on the thumb knuckle and first two finger knuckles.  When we get tired, we tend to shift weight to the outsides of our hands causing the thumbs to curl instead of remain intact on the mat.  I never  noticed I did that before. She said it’s a common mistake. It’s something I really pay attention to now.  I also learned alot about how to do chatarunga and upward facing dog properly.  I didn’t know to shift forwards a bit from plank so when you drop into chatarunga your elbows can stay above the wrists and make a ninety degree angle.  Then, shifting backwards before going into upward facing dog allows the shoulders to stay above the wrists.  I think I’ve been doing those two poses slightly wrong all along.   I tried a forearm stand for the first time ever.  It was not solid at all, so I think I will follow Rachel’s advice to continue strengthening and preparing for the pose by practicing dolphin (downward facing dog on the forearms)  more often.  The arm balance workshop was my favorite because I’ve been wondering how to get into those poses for a while now, and Rachel gave us clear instructions and demonstrations.  Now they make sense to me, and I can work them into my practice more often.  I got a footprint sized bruise on my upper arm from working so hard in class!  I was able to try all the arm balances she taught us but still have a lot of work to do.


bruise from arm balance workshop


handstand workshop with partner work

Below are three links to videos from the handstand workshop.



Rachel and Ringo teaching class



Rachel and Ringo


handstands at the go kart track

We met a lovely couple from Norway and enjoyed many good times eating, drinking, and laughing during our retreat.  They had an awesome idea to go to the go kart track for racing.  It’s something I probably wouldn’t have thought of doing, but I am so glad we went!  My man won the race, lapping me three times, as he is a seasoned motorcycle racer.  I didn’t mind coming in last place as I know racing is not my forte, but it sure was fun to do.  Despite the hot sun and the sweaty helmet, I was smiling and laughing my way around the track.  After we were done we thought it was a good spot for a handstand picture.


go karting with our new friends from Norway


al fresco dining at Machebo Beach Resort & Spa, Aruba

We took advantage of the all-inclusive meal option at the resort and enjoyed al fresco dining every day. Breakfast and dinner were at this restaurant by the pool, and lunches were at the cafe in the forefront of the picture. The views and the service were outstanding. Birds and iguanas joined us for breakfast every day, and the moon and stars twinkled over head during poolside dinners at night. The staff at the resort were incredibly warm and friendly. It’s a smaller, two story, hotel and I really enjoyed the personal attention we got during our stay. I have lots of food allergies, and I was impressed by their ability to accomodate my needs. In addition there were healthy fruit and vegetable based smoothies available every morning. Yum! We went out to dinner with the group once, visiting Rachel and Dennis’s favorite restaurant in town called Yemanja. It was a wood fired grill featuring delicious seafood, steaks, and vegetarian/vegan food. I got a superfood salad packed with greens, veggies, berries, and seeds and a ribeye steak with scallops on top.


iguanas by the pool


Rachel and Dennis

Our group took a sailing and snorkeling trip on a party catamaran from Palm Beach. What a fun activity! I don’t drink liquor except for (good) tequila, so it wasn’t a drinking day for me but for everybody else it was. We sailed up the shore and then stopped to snorkle first at a place right off the beach, not too deep. I snorkeled to the thore then right then left and back to the boat. It was amazing! I think I saw a baraccuda. I swam back toward the shore and then noticed the boat was raising the ladder. I guess I didn’t hear them blow the horn, so I swam back to the boat knowing they wouldn’t leave without me and rejoined the group. Others stayed on the boat to play on the water slide and jump off the side.


sailing and snorkeling trip


loving the view


loving the view


all smiles swith Dennis on the catamaran


happy people


the view off the back of the boat



Rachel and some of the ladies in our group

We sailed some more and then stopped to snorkle in sixty foot deep waters. There were different kinds of fish in that deeper water, and I thought it was interesting there were layers of different schools of fish in the waters. Some of them stayed low while others were higher up. I dived down a few times as far as I could (holding my ears so the pressure didn’t hurt) and then floated for a few seconds in awe as I was surrounded by schools of bright and beautiful fish. How cool to be in their world just for a few seconds. I ventured out a litte farther and then lost sight of any fish, so I came back toward the boat more this time.


our group after sailing/snorkeling trip

Here we all are, happy and high on life after the fun outing.


our group after the sail/snorkel trip


On the second day of SUP yoga, I wasn’t feeling too well. I was a little seasick after not having enough sleep and having a little too much fun the night before. To make things more challenging, I also got the orange board…the board that whoever is last and needs a board uses. The orange board is narrower and pointier than the other blue Boga boards. I took a “I’m a rock star. I can do this.” attitude and did my best. It sure was harder than the blue board I used during the first class!


planking on the Boga board


downward facing dog with hip opener


IMG_4499.JPGSUP yoga class #2 in Palm Beach, Aruba


heart/chest opener



side plank


finding balance


chair pose


had so many laughs with our Norweigan friends

We made new friends with people from all over the world. In addition to meeting other americans (Texas, Virginia, California, Washington, Arkansas, North Carolina, Colorado, New Jersey), we met people from Norway, Sweden, Canada, Brazil,and Aruba. Our new friends from Sweden even brought their teenage daughter along.


new friend from Sweden



until next time


thank you Rachel!

Since I wasn’t feeling well after SUP yoga class #2, I had to say goodbye to Rachel there on the beach. The whole group was walking down to a beach bar to continue the fun, and my flight was early the next morning. I thanked her for everything she taught me that week and for inspiring me. I couldn’t stop hugging her, just one more! My heart was full of love and gratitude. Just for fun, I asked if we could take the moment to get a handstand picture together. It was my last chance until who knows when. She happily obliged and went upside down waiting patiently for me to try and try again to join her long enough for a picture. She was so patient, hanging out in a beautiful handstand encouraging me saying, “you got it Susanne.” She right, I got it. Thank you Rachel!


in the presence of greatness





sunrise at the airport – departure day

This is a pictue of the sunrise at the airport when I was leaving. No filter, no hi definition enhancement. Just pure Aruba bliss. I am so grateful for my time there and can’t wait until the next time I can visit. Will have to stay for two weeks next time!

Thanks for reading this entry. Peace out!